McParenting

So, here is a good one. The Center for Science in the Public Interest has filed suit, on behalf of a mother, against McDonald's claiming that Happy Meals and the toys in Happy Meals are unfairly marketed to kids. The suit was filed for Ms. Monet Parnham who was quoted as saying that: "[she] objects to the fact McDonald's is getting into my kids' heads without any permission and actually changing what my kids want to eat". The Center claims that McDonald's action is "inherently deceptive and unfair". Fabulous. In the world of superfluous lawsuits, Ms. Parnham and Her "Center for Blah, Blah, Blah" have hit the mother load.
I am guessing I don't need to explain that this is clearly a mother unfit to raise children. I can imagine her sitting at home with foil on her head worried that television is either real or a CIA plot at mind control and , of course, she has to watch it (and probably watched 12 hours a day). To argue that a fast food chain has mind control argues that she is either so dumb or so susceptible that her kids, who may be lovely little waifs, are doomed to a life of bitter expectations molded by a woman who believes that Martians actually control a cabal that rules all the major corporations on the planet, and that toys is food packages beckon like sirens to ancient mariners. McDonald's itself sends out subliminal messages which brainwash children to think Happy Meals bring happiness and the American Dream.

Seriously, did this woman claim that McDonald's and not she have control of raising her children? I don't know about you, but I pass at least two McDonald's on the way to work and multiple ones over the course of the weekend taking my children to and from hockey or dance or other weekend activities. There is no tractor beam that I am aware of dragging me, or my kids, into the Golden Arches against my will. My children do not scream mercilessly as we speed past the drive thru lane and billboard menu. They don't cling to the car windows like prisoners in a maximum security penitentiary. As a matter of fact, my kids know that McDonald's is that odd treat that is the exception, not the rule.

So aside from Ms. Parham's idiocy, there is this "Center". I don't know much about these guys. They could be 2 guys and a laptop. They could be a cult that, in its spare time, sells. roses on the side of the road. They could be an organization truly trying to make a difference [Their website says they have existed since 1971 and claims they have 900,00 newsletter subscribers]. In that case, though, they might want to focus their efforts on causes that makes sense. In their own complaint, they say the are filing suit because: '[of McDonald's] touting Apple Dippers and low fat milk while putting french fries in the majority of Happy Meals". Really? McDonald's just puts the fries in and American parents kowtow to both the restaurant and their children in accepting the potatoes as opposed to something more healthy?

My solution is this. Tell Ms. Parham to go home and instead of watching "Days of Our Lives" or "Jersey Shore", spend an hour of her clearly free time watching the Cooking Channel for some tips. Try eating a meal or two at home. Then, if she can read, try reading a few books on parenting. Learn who has control - the parent or the child - and apply it. As for the "Center" stick to luring former hippies to their retreats for "flower power" and spare us as taxpayers and our legal system the burden of such ridiculous lawsuits.

Hey, why don't they "Just Have a Coke and a Smile".